Time for a makeover

Time to update this blog. But first - a new look. Then I'll come back and post something

I love my mum

I'm Not Pregnant

(phew)

... but, I am very sore. After a trip to my GP, who is very nice except for the pushing and prodding of my sore belly, I now have to go get an abdominal CT, bloodtests, etc tomorrow and then report back. It's turning into quite an adventure, this little pain - The Quest for the Source of the Mystery Pain!

But in the good news area he didn't say 'run to hospital now! something's gonna explode!'

I did, however, throw up once he finished prodding me. ( It went something like this: Does this hurt? Yes. This? Yes. How about now? Ow!! *vomit*). Sorry, just realised that might be too much information. But I've typed it now, and I dislike deleting. He did say that it's higher than my ovaries, so not a burst cyst (good), but part of my digestive track is protruding (bad). I don't even know what protruding means? Sticking out? Bloated?

So, that's my weekend homework. 1. Go to get a bazillion tests done. Oh, and 2. finish my draft of my thesis to send to my supervisor on Sunday night. Oh, and 3. a practice file for Civil Lit, and 4. draft a will for C&E, and 5. a probate application, and 6. visit my mum, and 7. grandma, and 8. nan, and 9. catch up with an OS friend flying in Sunday night. And of course this year we have 2 mother's days - 10. D's mum is now family too. Stressful? Just a tad. Not because of the people, just because of the timing.

But, I love seeing my family. I'm sort of hoping I can just spend the weekend with my mum, D's mum, and my 2 wonderful grandmothers, and ignore everything else. We'll see...

But, now I have to go - my wonderful school friends are coming over with dinner soon (aren't they amazing? My friend AP has prepared dinner to cook and bring over, and CS is coming with drinks, and D & his friend H are bringing over nibbles, and all I have to do is enjoy the company and not be on my own. Heavenly) - so I have to make this unit look less like a blankets-and-textbooks-explosion and more like a home!

xxx

ps: those little tests are amazing! They change colour and make patterns and the tip goes hot pink! Nice touch.

Who Wears Short Shorts?

I wore short shorts! ... and what a mistake that was.

I just got back in from my c25k w2d1 run walk as per my promise to Elisha, and it was harder than expected. But oh so good. And I ran so much futher than last time I did week 2, remember how last time I was finishing my cool down walk through the golf course when Short Round Retired Man told me I could keep going, so I ran to the bridge? This time I ran to the bridge before getting to the cool down phase of the run. I ran! I soared! I had fantastic form! I have incredibly sore legs!

I did stop a few times in the last 3 runs as The Pain came back up - because I still don't know what it is (more on last night's hospital visit in a sec) I didn't want to push to hard and rupture anything, unlikely though that may be.

But, back to the short shorts.

I swear, I have reverse body dysmorphic disorder - I have these days where I think I look just amazing. Now, don't get me wrong - I don't think I'm ridiculously hideous or that I can't look beautiful. I'm yet to meet a girl who doesn't look beautiful when she takes care of herself, let alone any girl who looks terribly ugly. But sometimes I wake up feeling super-glamorous. Like this morning. I was blown away by my ridiculously long legs, felt really in proportion - I felt like a size 8. Now, I do have very long legs (I'm 5'8, all of me is pretty long. When I'm thin I'm quite lanky), and I'm fairly well proportioned. But size 8?? I'm double that size. My BMI is overweight. I'm 86.9kg this morning! But I wasn't bloated - after all I haven't eaten that much the last few days thanks to The Pain.

So, I think to myself, I say, why not wear short running shorts?

I bought these little shorts when I got married. At the same time the Myers near my house closed down and everything became ridiculously cheap (the peach dress in the photo 2 posts earlier? $12.50). They're short, with pink stripes down the side and mini reflector panels for night running (ha! I actually thought I'd be a night runner!) and a teeny pocket for your key. They're quite cute. But they're short.

It started out ok, off I went on my walk, in my short shorts, semi-aware that my thighs touched just below where the shorts come to. And then I start running. And the shorts get shorter, and shorter, and shorter. My big white thighs were pulling my shorts up!

So I'm in this funny half-run-half-gait-style, shorts bunching, hands furiously pulling the shorts down, big white inner thighs flapping in the wind. Not the look I was originally going for! I must have amused everyone I ran past with my ridiculous run-pull-yank-run-flap-kick-to-the-side-pull-run routine. I certainly got some funny looks!

But I made it, and I felt good for it. And I have been reinspired to Lose Enough Weight That My Thighs Don't Touch.

A long legged shorts photo from Summer (07/08)

....

In other news, last night once D got home and had something to eat, we decided to go find a medical centre. We dropped by my parents to get my medicare card, but it was after 10pm and everywhere was closed. Of course, dropping by my parents meant they had a chance to get more concerned and convinced D to take me to the local hospital because it's probably appendicitis and my appendix could burst any second! Although not before my dad had the chance to ask if this was referred pain from not wanting to do my thesis! So, off we go, me saying "this is dumb, I should go to a dr tomorrow, it's not an emergency, we're just going to spend the night in a waiting room" etc etc.

Plus, because I'm in my mum's trakkies and D's hoodie with my flip flops and hair tied up loosely I figure they'll just think I'm a bum. (I'm in my mum's trakkies cause when we went to get the medicare card she declared my trakkies were too ratty to wear out and I had to change! oh she's cute)

Anyway, we get there. I sign some form saying I've read some Election Choice pamphlet and had it explained to me (which I never saw - this is a real sign I'm sick. Signing something I disagree with, the lawyer in me balked, but I just wanted it over with) and having rolled eyes from the clerk lady, who then refused to believe D and I were married as my medicare card is still in my maiden name and has my dad as the emergency contact. So what, our wedding rings are for some grand charade we decided to play on her in the emergency ward? Seriously. So she's to D "how do you know her?" and D's like "she's my wife" and she's like "no, really, how do you know her" ... grrr - so sure we're young, but I don't think he'd have had the same reaction with blonde hair and blue eyes.

Then we go to triage. And this is where I knew I'd feel like an inconvenience, and I do.

Nurse (N): what's wrong?
Me (M): I have a pain, here, on the left side of my abs
N: can you describe it to me?
M: it's sharp and shooting, it comes and goes. when it comes I sometimes have to crouch down, and I get very nauseous and dizzy. it's like a cramp, but sharper. when it's not as bad, like now, it's still sore and really hurts to touch but it's not as bad.
N: how long have you had this pain?
M: a few days, since the weekend?
N: when on the weekend?
M: well, I felt unwell Thursday, and it started coming on Friday. By Saturday it was really bad.
N: did you go to the hospital then?
M: No
N: (rolls eyes) a chemist?
M: No
N: (rolls eyes) GP?
M: No, my husband's been out all day and night and I didn't want to drive dizzy (plus I dont like the doctor and never want to go, but I didn't say this bit)
N: so, a week later you're in emergency (rolls eyes). What pain killers are you taking?
M: none
N: (rolls eyes) so it's not actually hurting?
M: it's hurting, I just don't take pain killers, I sleep (I don't take them ever, even after the car accident when the vertebrae in my neck were dislocated I didn't take them. Pain makes me fall asleep and pain killers never seem to make a difference, and I'm too scared I'll take too many after one experience years ago taking way too many tablets because I couldn't feel the one before working)
N: I see (rolls eyes). Are you pregnant?
M: (mind flashes back to recent post - omg, I'm pregnant! I knew I should have peed on a stick!) no, I don't think so
N: you're not or you don't think so?
M: I don't think so
N: Do. You. Have. Sex.
M: yes...
N: (rolls eyes) so - maybe.
M: ok, maybe (getting frustrated now)
N: mutters under her breath, something that sounds suspiciously like 'dumbass'
N: sit on the green chairs, a doctor will see you eventually. it's busy.
M: (looks at the waiting room. completely empty except for me. No doubt it's busy inside but can't someone just come and tell me I can go home and see my GP tomorrow?)

Several hours later, after sleeping on terrible plastic green chairs not being seen, we just leave.

Now, I know that nurses do a fabulous job, and I've been to emergency when it was an emergency (like after the car accident), and I know that I am fine and would have been fine just seeing a GP. But the eye rolling! And it DID hurt - it DOES hurt - it's hurt so much I've vomited and been crouched on the floor, damnit. And last time I had this pain in this place the doctor thought it was an ectopic pregnancy (it wasn't, thank God) but thats not something you play around with.

I know she was probably working a ridiculously long shift on ridiculously low pay and had better things to do with her time. But still, I felt terrible, and sore, and I didn't want to be there either. So that was my unpleasant night.

Sorry to grumble so much - I just really think she could have just said "look, I don't think anything's going to happen tonight - go home, see your GP tomorrow." That's not so hard is it?

Anyway, after all that I feel much better today. Still sore, but no crazy nausea except when I just woke up.

But I'm a bit nervous, doing some back-counting maths. Should I pee on a stick? I mean, crazy pain isn't usually a sign of pregnancy is it?

The Confession: I Weigh Almost 200 Pounds

This is the second post I've written today. But seriously, this is my 7th day in a row stuck at home (except for Saturday, I did get out then).

I'm watching Oprah, and a family just weighed in, in pounds. Lots of pounds. It's a show on decluttering a house and the connection with losing weight. Something I should do - declutter. I do tend to eat better and move more when I have a 'happy environment'. I'm very easily overwhelmed when our little unit is a junkfest, and get the guilts about leaving it in a poor state to go outdoors. Of course, that doesn't go so far as to motivate me to keep it tidy all the time, I just feel bad, curl up in the arm chair and sometimes eat icecream.

Anyway, to move towards my point, I went and checked out how much I weigh in pounds. Oh my goodness. 193.6 pounds.

ALMOST 200 POUNDS

Now, I know there are people who are summing up their weightloss journeys at just under 200 pounds, and people have lost half their weight to get to the sort of weight I am. But that's not me. This is not a weight I've come down to, it's a weight I've gone up to. And it looks a lot scarier in triple-digits. Like a dark scary evil character from a hideous movie. Ugh.

And I'm not going down a path of self-hate, I'm just waking up - but it's like I'm not waking up from a nightmare, I'm waking into a nightmare.

And I want it reversed. I've been thinking most of the day that I want it reversed.

So why did I eat icecream for lunch? Seriously - this is what I've eated today.

Breakfast: a mandarin, a banana, a small tub of yoghurt. Over about 90 minutes.

Lunch: 4 spoons of icecream eaten out of a rice bowl, with lots of choc-mint ice magic on top.

Mmm.. gotta love that unbalanced calorie-fest.

No kidding. No wonder I'm overweight. I'm still just eating because I'm so bored and sick of being at home and deprived of human company. The lowest part of being sick - seriously, yesterday I was waking as D left, and saw him for about 25 minutes yesterday before falling asleep again. Today will probably be the same. So what do I do while I'm awake? Eat! Auugghhh.

*Frustration*

I don't like being sick right now, I don't like having two chins, I don't like running out of breath, I don't like not wanting to shop for clothes, I don't like stressing about going out socially with people, I don't like my flappy pudding arms, I don't like my resolutions to start tomorrow start tomorrow start tomorrow, I don't like that even my eyelids are fat.

I feel more than double the weight I want to be, but if I lose half my weight I'll be 44kg, and that's ridiculous. Sometimes I feel like the very obese people whose blogs I read, who have that much weight to lose, have it easier - they can get results easiler, and they can make great claims like losing half their weight. Now I know that it's never that easy to lose weight - but seriously, the start of the journey seems to be easier, because once you're that overweight, cutting portion sizes and half hour walks will make a big difference. And it gets hard as you go on, but I feeling like I want to whine. And I want to lose half my weight. I'll never be able to make that claim, and I feel like I'll never lose enough for it to be significant.

I am a wallower.

And I think I should give away our TV. Too much of anything is not good for the soul.

x

Ce-le-brate Good Times, C'mon!

Congratulations to everyone!

In the last 24 hours I've found out:

• 2 very good friends of mine are engaged! (at last, hehe!)
• my cousin and his wife are having a baby! (a wonderful surprise for us and them - they only got married in December!)
• my friend from work is engaged!

Ok, it's not everyone, but that's a lot of good news! I also have so many friends getting married, well, about 5 couples, and another good school friend who's booked (with her bf) where she wants to get married (but no ring yet - still, that's gotta count as an engagement, non?)

It's all a bit exciting for little ol' me! I feel like I should be announcing a pregnancy to keep up! I'm half considering meandering down to a chemist, buying a little stick and peeing on it, just to double check I'm not next for exciting announcements.

In other news I'm still at home and still a bit sore. This makes it a week. So I'm going to get The Pain checked out tonight. My poor belly. It's spread right across my abs which is unpleasant. It's also made me very not hungry. Yesterday I ate almost 3 scoops of ice-cream: to make up my calories! I'm aiming at 1550 calories a day, thanks to calorieking's assessment of what I should eat to lose weight, and I wasn't even close yesterday. Thank goodness for icecream!! I knew it was good for me :)

Ok ok, I didn't actually need to eat the icecream, but I figured it's not often that it fits into my day, I was going to make the most of it.

..........

In other news, D's gotten to the point where he's thinking of leaving his job to go work in retail for the rest of the year then go back to uni next year. I really just want him to be happy, and would totally support him in whatever he does, but I can't help thinking he's just a teeny bit over qualified to work in a CD store - he has a degree and almost 2 years in a huge international company behind him - I don't know how to encourage him to try a new office before throwing in the whole industry, but at the same time, if he really thinks he'd love it then I think he should.

I just can't help thinking that he'd love to run a TKD studio more than anything, so that's what we should try and work towards. I don't know. Sigh.

Ok, inspired by Elisha, here's some photos from my camera :) They're not as recent, but photos are for sharing :)

D & a friend at a fancy hat tea party

My lovely law-school friends (plus 2 of our boys!)

Two girls from school I used to sharehouse with, celebrating at D's birthday picnic. Love them!

On our honeymoon, we had to have the tourist shot!

Oh what a feeling!
This is maybe my fave photo I've ever taken! And it's a film camera, not digital!
(It's D, on our honeymoon)

Aaah, memory lane :)

xx

ps: I went and picked up my prize yesterday. I was so excited! I've given D the chocolate and other edible parts, and am looking forward to my new make up and crabtree & evelynn products. But the best part is definitely the ceramic hair curler. But it's not working on my hair?? Oh well, it's currently working like a straightener, I can be happy with that :)

So Far So Good

Hi! I just got home from my jog/run/c25k w1d2 - another half an hour out with 60 second runs alternated with 90 second walks. It was quite easy - although I started with singlet, t-shirt and hoody, and ended up with the hoody around my waist. Which involved half running, half walking, while combating D's oversized hoodie to pull out my arms and then wrap it messily around my waist, trying to look semi-chic. Hehe, I didn't get the chic bit, but it did end up around my waist :)

There's one part of the track I run where I'm running next to the river, with some really nice houses on my right side, river on the left, and beautiful big trees giving shade as I go. It's only a small part (after all this is Inner City Sydney!) but those few minutes are really nice to run through.

My other favourite part of today's track was when I was running back through part of the end of the run, and slowed to the last 5 minutes walk, I go through a golf course. And one of the guys, a short happy looking man, was like "keep running! you can keep going!" in a very encouraging way. So I ran up over a bridge and back into the park, for some of my cool down time. Granted, as soon as I was out of his sight I pretty much walked again, but I felt like he had faith in me! You've got to find encouragement where it comes :)

Then walking home from where I finished (as I can't do 5k in 30 minutes yet!) I listenned to the first few songs from Colbie Collait's album Coco - very nice walking music (not enough angst to run to, actually no angst at all, but it's good to cool down walk to).

I'm quite pleased with the run/walk and I'm looking forward to the third one.

...

On the food side, well, I haven't been hungry since I've had this Pain (which is a bit better today) but I've been trying to eat. Yesterday I managed breakfast, no lunch, then ordered in thai for dinner for me and D - I ate some which is good. Today I've managed 2 glasses of OJ (one before running, one after), and I picked at some of the prawn crackers left over from yesterday, thankfully there weren't that many left! And I've got a big bottle of cold water sitting here with me, staring me down, so I'll drink that, in fact I might have a glass now!

Meanwhile, I don't think it's good to stay at home as much as I have been. Especially in our little 1 bedroom unit that's 7 big steps wide and 11 big steps long (ish) - total. Yikes! This morning I didn't even want to get out of bed and face the day at home - I'm home from work still feeling dizzy and sore - but I love D, he just came and ate his special K in bed while I lay there whinging about the day ahead, and he stroked my head. On a tangent, this is the one thing I love about being sick - when I was little and I was sick my mum used to cuddle me and stroke my hot head with her cool hand. The first time I was sick when we were married I was like a little kid again "is my head hot? is it hot? feel it, I know it's hot" and D was all "I don't need to feel it - I can see you're sick!" so I had to take him back down memory lane with me, and now when I'm sick he'll give me a cuddle and feel my hot head with his cool hand.

Anyway, today I'm determined to get out of this unit! Operation Part One: Drive Dave to Station was a success. Operation Part Two: Do c25k run was another success! Operation Part Three: Drive to Domayne and Collect Prize* is about to be started. Ideally without me falling asleep again. I don't know if anyone else gets this, but when I get sick, all I want to do is sleep. But enough is enough - I'm reclaiming my days.

xx

*I won a prize! I never win prizes! From a magazine too (check out SW Magazine via google) - and it comes with a hair curler ceramic thing too!

Not So Good at Mondays

Lately I've been very blah. I haven't actually done anything productive since about Wednesday last week, when I was at work. Thursday I slept in and watched TV because I felt I needed the break - I even made plans to meet up with a friend at uni to study but then stood him up. Which is pretty bad. Then Friday I started feeling sick so had a very very lazy day.

On Saturday I went for my morning run to meet my friend which was actually quite good and I did it in 30 minutes rather than the 45 I was expecting (although 4km is really not very far - 45 mins would be a slow walking pace!) but when we got home I felt really sick. I've been getting dizzy and nauseous lately, and I have A Pain under my left hip that comes and goes. When it comes it just makes me feel awful. So I was feeling pretty ordinary - but by the time we got to our meeting at 2pm I was really feeling bad. I was dizzy and couldn't read or concentrate - I ended up falling asleep. Luckily I made it to the break then asked the guys wife if I could lie down. She took my upstairs to their room, which was hard when the world was spinning, and I lay down and crashed out. D came and woke me about about 2.5 hours later to go home, and I slept in the car on the way home.

Then I felt better and we went to a 21st which was fun, and I was ravenous - I just wanted to eat! So I ate some food, but not too much, and talked to people and did the party thing. I even danced very briefly. Then we came home and I crashed, I very nearly fell asleep in my clothes (after a nap on the way home in the car) but at least managed to brush my teeth!

Sunday D left without waking me and I slept in until about 11am, and then went to go get something to eat. By the time I got to the kitchen the Pain was so sharp I doubled over and almost fell down. It really really really hurt. I almost called D to come home and thought about calling 000 incase it was appendicitis. But I got to the couch and it felt a bit better. Anyway, I spent all Sunday reading blogs - especially the archives of Dietgirl, but had to take breaks because I was getting all dizzy again.

I didn't do hardly any thesis work.

Today I feel a bit better, but I haven't gone in to uni. I just don't want to - I feel 'toxic' and unwell, and very fluey in an achey way, but not a clogged up way. Maybe I'm just allergic to hard work?

But then, part of me thinks "I'm an Honours Law Student with a Big Firm job! I'm not Just Lazy, damnit, I've worked hard to get here!" but at the same time I just feel so sick and dizzy. Sigh.

And yesterday D got upset, because he's been amazing trying to give me space to write my thesis and get it done, including cooking, grocery shopping, bringing home lunch, etc, and I hadn't done anything. After that I took the laptop to bed and didn't a little bit of work there, but today is really going to have to be Hard Work Day.

I'm thinking to celebrate I might go for a run. Then try and rustle up a friend to work with. All this time on my own is not good for my head.

....

In other more weight-related news, I've joined up to CalorieKing, and I'm tracking my food and exercise there. It's a lot like ww points, but using calories instead. It even has space for an in-house blog and forums etc. Has anyone who reads this ever used it? I'd be keen to hear some feedback.

I'm using the scales at home to weigh myself, with Saturday Morning being my WI day - this week it was 88kg - yikes! Heavier than when I started ww! But this morning it was already 87.1 - so I think I was still full from the night before. Anyway, my first mini-goal is to get to 85kg so here goes! It also gives me a neat 30kg to lose. Jeeeee that's daunting. But after reading all these posts of people who are now half their size (!!) I feel like I can give it a good go and lose the weight.

Ok, Study Time!! Call a Friend Time!! and Run Time!! - in reverse order.

xx

My Outdoor Gym

So, exercise is integral to weightloss. Exercise is very integral to my weight loss - especially morning exercise. Then I have that goofy glow all morning of I Did Something For Me and when faced with scrumptious calorie packed temptations, I can Smile And Say No Thankyou much more easily. Even if it's Evening Exercise, I am more likely to be better during the day, knowing that I don't want to waste that exercise session just on the junk I ate today.

So, I'm going to amp up my exercise. By amp up, I mean restart. "Start at the very beginning, a very good place to start. When we read we begin with A-B-C, when we jog we begin with walk-plod-walk. walk-plod-walk". Mmmm.

I've noticed on lots of people's posts & blogs, including DietGirl's - as I read my way through the archives identifying the whole way - that gym routines play a big roll in most people's weightloss. But here's the thing, I don't go to a gym. I have big plans of going to a Shiny City Gym next year when I'm working FT in the heart of the city, but in the meantime, it doesn't fit the budget. And there's no where in Sydney I'm at 3 days a week, so it would involve extra travel, which would suck. So, I am going to create my very own My Outdoor Gym.



My Outdoor Gym has no membership fees. But, if you feel you need to pay money to stay dedicated, you can pay it into a container in your room, then as you lose the weight you also make savings to spend on luxurious treats as you reach your weightloss and fitness goals (or sexy new workout gear, seeing as mine is trakkies I bought in Big W and old t-shirts!)



My Outdoor Gym has a wide range of cardiovascular machines. Your Legs are a favourite with many participants, walking and running, or combinations thereof are known to be very successful in weightloss and improved fitness. Other options include skipping, beach swimming, backwards walking (not for the coordinately impaired), swinging, monkey bars, soccer, football, frisbee, dogwalking, and games with friends.



My Outdoor Gym also has a wide range of weights based activities. Pushups, Squats, Lunges, That Thing They Do On Biggest Loser Where They Lie Down On Their Stomach Then Jump Up Then Repeat, Carrying Soup Cans, and Pushing On Things.

Naturally, Stretching and Toning Exercises are also included.



My Outdoor Gym not only caters for your health through exercise, but also allows a good dosing of Vitamin D as you enjoy the sunlight, although exercise between the hours of 11am and 2pm are not recommended in the Australian Sun.



My Outdoor Gym can be conducted anywhere outdoors, and most activities can be accomplished even when Indoors.

Today's Activities at My Outdoor Gym include a 'run' to The Meeting Place to meet a friend. We're both running from our own homes - mine's about 4km away - and then meeting up for a drink, then going back home. It's part of our We Want To Run But Don't Want Anyone To See Us Running Yet program! I'm allowing 45 minutes, expecting to do a lot of walking in that time!

After that we have another India Meeting this afternoon, and a 21st tonight - as well as invitations to a dinner party and to a night of Bowling in the City and French Riviera Icecream (the MOST AMAZING ICECREAM EVER), but I'm hoping we're only going to do the 21st and bail on the rest to allow for some more study time.

I'm Not Giving Up!

Not Giving Up.

ok, so I just said I was going to be AWOL for a while, and I've been so down about not losing the weight on ww - not bc of ww, but bc I haven't been actually following the program. But, after reading through Jo's blog and Elisha's blog and having a good read through DietGirl from the beginning of her journey, it hit me again - it works. Eating better food and moving more works. You just have to do it. And not give up.

So I'm going to keep at it. I've been a real slug lately - staying indoors watching tv or making half-arsed attempts at studying, and I've been eating a lot, and not well. For example, today I've had banana on bread, watermelon, followed by prawns, followed by chocolate, followed by wine. Delicious, but not exactly a healthy way to eat through the day. So I'm going to make a better effort than than. It worked when I was signed up to ww and following, so it'd better work now.

And I'm going to keep weighing. And I'm going to keep putting up my weight, and staying honest.

Which I guess means starting now - having been MIA for a while, beware, but I'll jump on now and let you know in a sec.... going to scales... standing on scales... reeling in shock!.... 87.6kg.

My new starting weight. Round it up to 88kg and I have a tidy 30kg to lose to get to my personal goal. That's humungous. But, I won't be the first person to do it.

In other news, I got my exam timetable - 10 June & 12 June are the scary exam days. Not to mention the thesis is due on 23 May and there's 2 assessments due before then.

Bring it.

Friday - hooray!

Ooh, it's good that it's Friday now!

My latest wish-list item is a ghd hair straightener, that would be so great!

that's all :)

MIA

I haven't blogged in a while. I wrote a post all about how I felt, but I haven't published it - I think it might be a bit too raw. But it was good to write.

I've been working and studying in the last little while - it's now 1 May and the thesis is due on 23rd!! I've also been working and seeing lots of friends, which is nice.

I pulled out of ww, I just wasn't sticking at it and I need to wait until I have the headspace to. Not that I'm going to stop watching what I eat and do - I just know I'm not following the program and I don't want to pay knowing I'm not committed to it. I know that's slack, but it's where I am right now. And we're going to India in July so money's kind of tight.

Anyway, I'll keep coming back and posting, after I get through the thesis!

xx

Wednesday was a weird day

So today I worked and had lunch with friends (a japanese curry, very yum) but was really tired and ate maltesers at the 3pm chocolate o'clock. D's at a job interview to work for a new company, which is quite exciting. We're going out with friends to a pub where you can bbq your meal at the pub - it's trendy, so we hear ;) we're going with d's engineering friend and his wife (are you surprised - 2 engineers figured dinner would be great at a bbq in a pub!).

I hope D gets this job - I'd love us to both work at places we love. 

xx

Today is Tuesday (H: 86.3)

Weight Change from Yesterday = +/- 0.0
Weight Change from WI = -0.9
Exercise Today = general walking around, lots of walking at work
Water Today (8+) = not nearly
Food Today (Core) = toast, chicken pesto sandwich, some lollies, vegemite bread, sprite, chocolate mousse... hmm

Yesterday I slept most of the day - I woke up, blogged, watched some tv, then slept til 5.30. I slept on Dave's side of the bed breathing in his scent in his pillow, and when I woke up, I could still smell him on my skin. I felt so happy.

Last night we went for dinner with our newlywed friends, and had so much fun. We played 'banana scrabble' - which is scrabble where it's each person for themself. I won 2 and Catie won 2. We laughed a lot and drank good wine. I left some food on my plate. I felt giggly and fun.

Today I worked. I moved to a new part of work and I loved it. I did some research, walked to counsel chambers with some documents, collated some evidence. I felt productive and valued.

Tonight I'm updating this blog while waiting for Dave to come home from Taekwondo. I'm looking forward to some dinner together and catching up about our days. I feel loved.

Tomorrow is a new day, with new surprises and new celebrations. I'm looking forward to it.

xx

Motivational Monday! (H: 86.3)

LESS THAN 36 WEEKS TO CHRISTMAS!
(To get to goal at Christmas, I have to lose... 14.3kg)

Stars Yesterday = None, but I did ok I think!
Weight Change from Yesterday = +0.1
Weight Change from WI = -0.9
Exercise Today = [it's raining! I'd like to do c25k anyway though!]
Water Today (8+) =
Food Today (Core) =

A quick review. Saturday was Therese's wedding - lovely but LOTS of food (a 5 course dinner, anyone?) but also lots of dancing, and even doing the twist! and walking in the morning. Sunday was church, a bit of an argument at home with Dave, which lead to some icecream eating, but I stopped after one scoop at least! Making up with Dave pretty quickly, a nap, and dinner with Dave's family at vietnamese restaurant for his birthday. Lots of food!!!

Therese's wedding was amazing! It was really lovely - and very dramatic! She looked amazing, Cameron couldn't take his eyes off her all day! It was great to catch up with "the girls" who I went to school with, heard some very exciting news from Pun (but I'm sworn to secrecy damnit! lol, hopefully I can announce it soon!). The church service was lovely, a good talk, Cameron's grandfather prayed for them, which made me cry and miss my Grandpop. We had cofffee at Bar Italia after the wedding, and I had a skim hot chocolate (I know, not core, but their hot chocolates are so good!) and then dinner with 5 (yes FIVE) official courses!! We had:

-cheeses,

-salmon salad/chicken asparagus pie,

-followed by baby clam fettucine/mushroom risotto,

-followed by fish/veal, followed by cake with gelato,

-followed by a fruit platter,

-followed by tea and amazing Italian coffee!

That's a lot of food! Oh but it was fun! And Dave and I were getting on so well, and we danced all night!! That's gotta be worth something! It was lots of fun!

Some photos: (I know I'm tall, but I have to stop slumping in photos!)

It was very dramatic - with smoke as they walked into the function centre and lots of WOW moments!

Although, I did get he pregnant question - ouch. In fact it wasn't actually a question - the mother of the bride (who I've known since I was in school, at least since year 7 if not primary) came up to thank me for some pre-wedding help I'd done and say hello, then, placing her hand on my stomache she said "well, I see you won't be able to drink, but there will be some lovely food" - ouch! But she looked so pleased and happy with this "news" that I just said "thanks" (it was her daughter's wedding day, I didn't want to make her feel embarrassed!) then told my school friends and ensured I had a glass of wine in my hand all night! Oh dear. So, no more baby-doll type dresses until I reach goal!

And I noticed I always slump in how I stand, especially in photos. Aiiii.

But I had a good night, and a nice Sunday too.

Sunday I really tried to get back on track - I left the morning tea alone at church (I'm getting quite good at that now!) had a healthy breakfast and lunch, and when we went out for dinner for Dave's birthday with his parents and cousins, I made one bowl of rice last the whole night!! Which is pretty good I think. And a really good time catching up with his parents and cousins, which is good. It's nice that we all get on as a family now.

Anyway, today is a study & housework day - but the weather is clearing up so I might try and hit up a run too!

xx

Sunny Sunday (H: 86.2)

Didn't get to post at all on Sunday! I was going to and then Dave was upset that I spend more time blogging than with him. So we had a good day together (I'm glad he pointed it out, blogging can be addictive!) - so I'll fill you in on Monday's post!

Stars Yesterday = Two (yay!)

Weight Change from Yesterday = -0.8

Weight Change from WI = -1.2

Exercise Today = walked 4km with Heath, and danced with Dave all night at the wedding

Water Today (8+) = at least 8

Food Today (Core + up to 3 of 15 pts) = Core + a wedding :S

B = Special K with Skim Milk and Banana, and skim chai (teabag style)
S = Watermelon, crackers, pesto dip
L = no lunch (I know, bad) - I was asleep!
S = Skim Hot Chocolate at Bar Italia (yum!)
D = Wedding Reception! 1 cocktail, 3 wines, entree of asparagus chicken pie/salmon salad, first main of mushroom risotta & baby clam fettuccine, second main of seafood and veal, first dessert of wedding cake with gelato, second dessert of fruit platter, italian coffee. (BUT I didn't eat all of any of the foods! and I drank water!)

Weight Update

Well it's going down! That's good! It's already 1.2 less than on Thursday. How quickly it's gone down makes me pretty sure it was retained water from all the salts I was eating, and bloatedness. As long as it keeps going down! I was a bit surprised because that's a big drop from yesterday, but I ate 3 good meals, 2 snacks, even the tim tam, so I'm just going to take it and be thankful :)

Yesterday in Review

Yesterday was really good, I did:

jog with D - tidy house - cook healthy lunch - watch some tv - tidy - meet parents & F&R for coffee - shop - cook - India dinner at our place - go to parents to pick up umbrella - take umbrella to Therese's - back to parents to collect forgotten phone - visit Heath - crash out and sleep.

I enjoyed doing some exercise, had a cheery day. We had an amazing dinner for the India trip, it was great catching up with everyone. And I was so good! I set it up as self-serve, so I could only serve myself a little bit, for dessert we had fresh watermelon, rockmelon, strawberries and ice-cream, and I skipped on the icecream, and because I was fixing up in the kitchen I mostly avoided the cheese plate before dinner!

Oh, and I especially went out and bought 3 limes (even though they're hideously expensive, and we're used to getting them for free from D's parents) - so we could have a bit jug with iced water and limes, and I drank lots of water. I didn't even have any wine or soft drinks. Yay!! I did, sadly, cave and have a tim tam, then a bit of brie with D after everyone left, we'd gone to Therese's with the umbrellas, then Heath's to get a camera (where I fell asleep, lol, it was so late, but the boys wanted to play some new playstation game Heath had), but I've counted the points and I'm on track.

It's amazing, just turning down icecream (at 4.5 points/scoop) makes a big difference to the points I'd have eaten otherwise!

Oh! And my other little accomplishment - my mum rang me in the afternoon, saying she was at the doctors with my sister & brother in law, and now they were finished so did I want to come for coffee. So I was like, doctors? Ohmygoodnessshemustbepregnant! So off I went very excited and got more excited as I saw both my mum and dad were there, as well as F&R. Lol, so I was a bit disappointed when I found out F had just had her cervical cancer vaccine injection (which you should definitely get if you're eligible and in Australia - our government is giving it to us) and mum had just had a check up. Sigh... so no aunty news just yet (but at least it wasn't bad news either). They'd just thought it'd be nice to catch up. Which it really was.

We went to Cafe Envy in Summer Hill - if you're an inner westie definitely I recommend it, their food and coffee is amazing! And even though they had iced coffees and chais and all sorts of amazing foods, I ordered a tea with skim milk and really liked it (and it's core! yay!). Love it.

Challenges Today

Today my good friend Therese gets married! I'm so excited for her! I saw her late last night and she looked so excited! I wish I could have stayed and chatted all night with her but she was with her family so I just dropped off the umbrellas (we have big white golf umbrellas from our wedding, and Sydney is raining, but today is actually sunny!) gave her a big hug and still have goosebumps looking forward to the wedding!

But weddings do mean foodie challenges. Most notably drinking, reception meal (especially as she's going to an amazing Leichardt Italian place!) and the pre-wedding-catch-up-lunch with school friends! But, thinking about it, I'm quite happy drinking just water - I had wine at C's wedding 2 weeks ago which was delicious, so I might try this reception on water (lol I give the pregnancy questions 5 minutes if I stick to water! But we'll see), and I'm going to try and stick to the food that's 'most' core, and NOT eat everything on my plate - even if I only leave a little bit, I'm trying to cultivate a habit of leaving some so I can be comfortable stopping when I'm full.

So, How Much Have You Lost on WW?

This is the question my dad asked me late last night when we dropped in after dinner to pick up their spare big white umbrella to take to Therese's.

It made it hit home that I've been doing this for 10 weeks and weigh the same (geeeeze....) - so I just said that I'd lost some and put some back on and lost some etc, but the final result was confidential. At least he said I was looking slimmer and he'd like to come along with me. Which I was very surprised at! I know I'm a tiny bit more toned, just from doing some exercise, but not anything too noticeable, but he said he was impressed I'd stuck at it and he'd like to come. So that would actually be pretty good, to have that accountability with my dad, we'll see :D

To Taekwondo or Not To Taekwondo?

D does lots of TKD - in fact he's usually there 2-3 times per week, and he teaches (he used to officially compete at very high levels) and he's very good (4 grades above a black belt). Today he invited me to come along and train with him. Sometimes I go, but I usually study in the office while he trains - I've trained once but it's so hard!! I turned him down today, but now I 'm thinking about it. Maybe I should pick it up? I'm trying to decide if I should pick it up while unfit and struggle through, or get fit first then pick it up (because everyone knows me through him and it could be very embarrassing). Thoughts?

Finally, Shopping is Expensive!

In other news, I was blown away by the price of shopping yesterday, and I went to FRANKLINS! Albeit Summer Hill Franklins, which is a trendy area, and I shopped for a dinner for me & 7 men (and even after they had seconds and some thirds, they'd only got through less than half) but it cost me over $100. I was blown away.

I wanted to have a nice dinner so I just did want lots of my yuppie friends do (lol), I got some brie, some fruit cheese, 2 types of crackers, and I bought some nice vegies (like snow peas and capsicum, nothing outrageous), some watermelon and rockmelon, chicken (which was a killer), ice cream, feta, spinach leaves, baby corn, pine nuts etc (for a pumpkin salad), and some packet mix for mint slice cake which I didn't make up, oh, and about 4 packs of thai noodles, and none of it was more than $5, but gee it added up quickly. It was a nice dinner, but (and I know I'm not yuppie but) I'd have been as happy with pasta and a green salad, no cheeses etc... I think our next guests are getting bolognaise!

Long Posts

My posts are getting really long... sorry... I'll try and do some shorter ones that might then get read :)

xx

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's under 85 I Go! (H: 86.8... -0.4)

Stars Yesterday = none
Weight Change from Yesterday = -0.4
Weight Change from WI = -0.4
Exercise Today = 25 minute walk/jog this morning
Water Today (8+) = Cups = 8 :D
Food Today (Core + ideally up to 3 of 21pts) = Core + 6 points

(B= water, butter-vegemite sandwich + banana)
(S = Indian Chai teabag with skim and 1 tsp sugar - it said make it sweet, but ew, I don't like sugar in hot drinks any more! weird. Interestingly e-tools said 0 points for 1 tsp raw sugar?? I've counted half though)
(L = Tuna Pasta - a tomato, carrot, 2 mushrooms, tomato in a jar, and tuna stirred through pasta with some low fat cottage cheese, easy, hot, filling, all core and delicious!)

(S = Hot tea with skim milk)

(D = curry (counting the coconut milk and curry), fresh salad, some brie, lots of water, fresh fruit, Core + 3 points)

(S = Tim Tam (damnit) - 2 points)

I'm back on track and totally focussed. Now, given, I'm usually on track at 8.30am, but I'm serious about it this time!

D was great this morning - after I asked him last night, he woke me up at 6.30 for a jog today. Ok, well, he started trying to wake me at 6.20, and I didn't get up until almost 6.40, but he didn't give up (I love him!) and off we went together, and did a jog. I went back a week in c25k - I wanted to start again at week 1 but he didn't have the podcast for it on his ipod and it's better when we are listening to the same thing and same run/walk cues. Because I was so sleepy (we didn't leave the house until 10 to 7, when we were meant to be back at 7!!) we had to cut it short by 5 minutes, which means we did 5 runs rather than 6, at 90 seconds each, but hey, we were out there and we were running! I like doing my river track run - I recognise the other runners now and we smile and pant out a 'hi' as we run or walk past each other.

I'm also keen to eat really really well this week - I've decided to follow Shazzy's lead and try out core for a week, see how that goes. I really want to be on track!!

Yesterday's Weigh In
Yesterday's WI was a terrible experience. I was going to use my 'no-weigh' pass knowing how awful the past few days had been, but then I thought, 'no, I'm going to be honest at least' and after whispering to my lead "I'll stand on the scales, but please just don't say a word" I closed my eyes and stood on the scales. And my wonderful leader (who usually is very vocal in offering congratulations or encouragements) was wonderful, she didn't say anything, just wrote down the number. Then, with a smile, she said "congratulations on sticking to this for 10 weeks, keep going. well done". I could have hugged her.

But, cold hard truth, I put on 2kg. 2kg! Ouch. that wipes out all my loss from the last 10 weeks. It seems every week I have a good week, a then have a bad one afterwards. Shocking. I wore my jumper and jewellery on the scales (cause really, how much worse could it make it) but I was still shocked. I stayed for the meeting but don't know how much I heard - I was just feeling awful.

I messaged D cause I always message him after a WI, with the result. Feeling very down I messaged him "I am a weight watchers failure". But he messaged back:

"Honey, i know you're been working hard & also stressed with uni & work. Keep persevering! I know you can do it! D Xoxo"

I nearly cried, I've just been so exhausted and working so hard, and was so tired and felt so flat, and I just loved him for writing that.

I had a chat with him last night, and asked him to help me with exercise for a little while. And he has said he will (hence this morning's jog), and I really appreciate it. I know what I have to do, but I appreciate so much his help in in doing it alongside me.

No Excuses Day
So, today is my new day and no excuses will be accepted! We have people coming over for dinner so I'm going to make a ww receipe and we can have some fresh fruit for dessert - I'm thinking some watermelon and rockmelon cut up. There's no need to give them unhealthy food when I don't want to eat it either. I've done my exercise for today, and I'm going to eat core food.

2008 The New Me
Ok, well it's now April and I know you're meant to make these resolutions in January, but I'm thinking of how I want to be and look, and I'm going to make some changes! I was thinking yesterday how unattractive I feel, especially with this weight, and how cyclic it is - feeling unattractive because I'm overweight. Figuring I might as well eat because I'm overweight. Well enough is enough. So - here's some changes (I'll put these on the RHS margin as well)...

* Eat well. Either a Core week or a Points week. And stick to what I'm doing that week.
* 30 minutes exercise every day.
* Update on food, water and exercise on my blog, start of the post.
* Paint my toenails a nice colour
* Have nice hair - use nice shampoo and conditioner that smells nice. Spend some time making it look good.
* Keep hair free - just because I'm going to wear long pants doesn't meant I should have prickly legs.
* Nicely shape my eyebrows
* Wear high heels - at least to work, no more flats and fewer thongs
* Keep clothes looking nice
* Reduce TV time to 1hr or less a day or just sitting and watching
* Use a receipe book to make dinner at least 1 meal a week, instead of just imagining as I go.

Mmm, that will do for now :) I'm off to find a core-friendly breakfast.

Cya!

xx

Excuse_Maker_Confession

The difference between the old me and the new me is my ability to overcome excuses.

So it's unusual to make two posts in a day, but I have to confess. I was thinking about this last night, and today, and again when I read that post. I'm such an excuse maker.

My name is Kathryn, and I make excuses.

Seriously - look at that last post. Sure I had a busy weekend, sure I had lots of work to do, sure I had a birthday celebration, sure I was tired. But I still ate crap and didn't exercise. And really, I could and should have done much better. At least walking and eating better.

So, I'm starting a new part of my blog - a list of the times and things I have used as excuses. With the hope that I stop making them!!!

I've been on ww for 10 weeks now, and keep going up and down. I really want this 82.5 GWEA, and I want to be healthy and have a healthy lifestyle. So, I'm going to stay on track. Yes.

Oh, and this week I've decided to do Core.

That's all.

xx

Note - Just after writing this I had a look at a few blogs that I like keeping up on and saw this amazing post on Shazzywomble's Blog and I have to say, wow. It's not rocket science, but it's so true. I'll quote it here:

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Some one asked me..

How often I fell off the Wagon.. You know what?? There is NO WAGON! It's simple if I can't allow for it in your allowance you just don't have it, you have the power to say no! You just have to. If someone offers me something I can't allow, I just don't have it. I don't ruin weeks of effort to be polite. There have been times I have been to peoples houses and desserts have been offered which I simply couldn't allow for, so you know what? I said no thank you! I often bring my own yoghurt so I can have that as others are having their dessert.

It's really basic! you follow the plan and it works.. you don't follow the plan and it (sorry to tell you) WON'T. Both WW plans work IF you stick to them! It's up to you!

Posted by ♥Shaz♥ at 11:01 AM

I'm back! (H: 86.8 - yikes!) (WI: 87.2, ouch ouch ouch)

Wow, what a huge few days!!

CEP Practice File
After that flu last week, feeling sick, my assessment for CEP was due in on Monday, and it was massive! I'm doing college of law, and our assessments involve running a practice file - for this assessment we had to run a matter where our fake client buys a fake business. It's so much work! We had to write all the letters, emails, advices, file notes etc we'd do in real life, translate the mortgage into real english rather than 'legalese', do the contract, etc etc. So I had a huge weekend getting in finished! I was up until 3am doing the work, and then back at my desk (which is actually the loungeroom floor at the moment!) from 6.30am. That's a lot of study time! I made it through the start pretty ok-ish - using sugarfree V and going for a walk or two for study breaks - but by the end I was surviving on giant pythons, coffee, and so on! I actually had gone down by the end (as I didn't actually eat that much - when I get so tired I don't get hungry) but THEN after handing in the file at 6pm Monday night (and sleeping from 8pm Monday night), Tuesday was Dave's birthday!

Dave's Birthday
Well Tuesday was Dave's Birthday. So, being the wonderful wife that I am (naturally, lol) I got up early on Tuesday, in the 6ams - which is 10 hours after I went to bed but still felt ridiculously early - and made a hot breakfast of eggs, tomato, mushroom, crumpets, etc, and banana smoothies for breakfast. And he enjoyed it which is good! Then off to work (falling asleep on the train) where I gave in and enjoyed 2 hot chocolates, coffee, and by lunch was so tired that I bought a pasta to sustain me (it was small size, which is better than old habits, but it was creamy, and I have no idea how many points!), and more hot chocolate in the afternoon. Then came home - where I was basically sleeping with my eyes open and went right past my stop by several stations! So had to change and come back to where I live, and D & I went out to AMAZING Thai at Doy Tau in Newtown and then a movie. We saw Vantage Point, which was better than I'd expected, although some people walked out - maybe they got bored watching the same 20 minutes over and over (you see a president get asassinated from a variety of viewpoints), then home. Wow, so tired!

Thai was great though - we had satay chicken sticks (D's fave) and BBQ Octopus (my fave) for entree, and shared rice with seafood stirfry for mains. Yum!

Then, of course, work again on Wednesday!!

Wednesday
Wednesday D and I went in early to hang out in the city - we had ricotta/plum danish (shared between us) and hot chocolate (skim at least), then another long day at work, where I had some more hot chocolate. I was better at lunch, eating my salad and cheese sandwich, phew, but then a friend had a chocolate drive so I bought some maltesers from him (the drive goes to his rugby team buying shorts! lol!) and shared them with everyone around me, and when it got to half empty (I'd probably eaten about 20 and shared about 25), I gave the rest of the box to the guy who sits next to me cause I didn't want to eat any more! But maybe I shouldn't have bought it in the first place!

Last night by the time I got home I had some cottage cheese and tomato on bread, and crashed out to sleep.

But I've had no movement and some pretty bad eating, so I think I'm going to use my no-weigh pass - but still go to my meeting. I had a big wrestle about whether or not to go, feeling like this week was SUCH a shocker (and I'm still so tired I just want to crash out at home) but I think I should go. Long term perspectives, right?

Well, that's the condensed version of my last few days!

Oh - but I have some good news! I work in a part of a law firm that codes documents that will be used in court cases - it's a humungous data entry job, we barcode, scan and code pages. My part is coding - which means I data entry the date, title, people in etc of a document. But yesterday I got a call and I'm going to work in Litigation, another part of the firm, which does all the work in courts, with a partner I really respect. Yay!! So I'm looking forward to that!

Ok, cya!

xx

Head Above Water (H: I have no idea)

I haven't blogged in days - so much for my running updates! I've have a crazy few days. Am exhausted from keeping my head above water. Have eaten not lots of food, but what I've eaten has been "survival food" (lollies and milkshakes). Fill you in tomorrow - I'm getting some sleep.

xx

Weekend Danger Zone (H: 85.5)

And so the weekend begins.... *scary music*

Ok ok I actually love my weekends, but I have to be honest, I ALWAYS gain weight over the weekend. I try not to, but I do! So this weekend I'm being super-conscious of what I eat and do and I'm determined to come out on Monday morning weighing less than I do today - ie: less than 85.5 on my home scales - even if I have to stand on one leg, lean out at 45 degrees and wave my arms madly to do it!

A snapshot of my weekend, and how I'm going to put my plan in action:

Friday: was meant to see a friend for movie & dinner, but piked due to late night Thursday night. Ended up just sleeping at home, so I'm not really going to count that lame excuse for a night out!

Saturday (today): Plans = meet friend for coffee at 10.30, finish practice file for assessment on Monday (high stress!), food shopping for empty house, & house party tonight.

Plan in Action: Have a skim chai or skim FW at coffee, NO banana bread! ... Eat diet jelly for sweet fix for studying, AVOID chocolates ... Write a list for shopping and stick to it. Buy a good study treat - like a rockmelon or a watermelon - and some sugarfree V cause I'll need it tonight... eat dinner before the party tonight and arrive lateish so there are people to chat to, buffering the way to wherever the food is! Drink lots of water, eat only 3 things and TRACK THEM - and only if it's in my points. Enjoy catching up with friends.
Go for a walk today! At least do the river walk, if not do a "Sydney Walk".

Sunday (tomorrow): Plans = Church in the morning (with 2 morning teas, remember!), lunch at D's parents place, study to finish the practice file. Dinner at home with D.

Plan in Action: Take breakfast in the car to eat on the way to church - it means I finish eating just before we start so there's not stomach grumbling when I see morning tea! And take a bottle of water in my bag to avoid the juice - maybe even take an apple to munch on while others eat cakes and slices... Eat a small amount at lunch, drink lots of water, hope it's healthy~ ... Go for a walk with D. Track what I eat. Enjoy the day :D

See, when it's put down in writing, it's not so bad. Just remember a jumper on those walks - the weather's getting chilly!

Sydney Walks Book
Yesterday I bought a book of different walks around Sydney. It was only a few dollars ($4 or $7 I forget which one) from Basement Books (in the devonshire street tunnel next to Central Station - best bookshop ever - if they have what you want) and it has all these routes of walks with little explanations you can do around Sydney. They's lots of suburbs walks, as well as the bridge walks, beach walks, cliff walks, etc - even 3 or 4 in my neighbourhood! So (I proudly informed D yesterday) D & I are going to do every single one of the walks! I'm looking forward to it actually - I've even got out a highlighter and pen to mark off the walks as I go! One a week would be ideal, but I'm happy with the start. Most are very short - about 2km, some are about 5km, they all look pretty gentle, and there's a paragraph or so on the the landmarks and features of each route. Good hey.

Ok, well it's 7.30am now so I'm about to morph into a nerd and hit the books. Wish me luck! This file is worth 40% of my course and I have hours of work to do on it.

xx

Points
7.10am Half a bowl of diet jelly [study cravings start early!] (0 > 0)

8.30am Toast (1) with Baked Beans (1.5) (2.5 > 2.5)



*****************************************************************************

Ok, I'm going to be honest. I've eaten a huge amount. I've had tastes of leftover vegies (0) from last night, and a piece of bread with jam and butter (2). And a rice bowl full of peanuts, (?) some mint baileys (?) and milk (1.5). I've eaten 2 biscuits (2) and just gotten home from maccas where I got an XL diet coke (0), small chips (4.5), and a McFeast burger (?? 9-10?). And I still want to eat - I feel like I can't study without junk food - and I'm studying, so I'm craving, big time. I feel like marshmallows, V, chocolate, and my all time fave study food, killer pythons.

*****************************************************************************
Okay - just got home again. I got home from maccas, wrote that post, and as I was writing my wonderful best friend showed up for our coffee date (which had been postponed since this morning) but instead we went for a walk - almost 5km! Now my pedometre's got over 11,000 steps on it, I feel refreshed and I just rang D and said to not worry about any of the junk food (just the sugarfree V!). I know I'll get a star for exercise today on my home star-chart, and I'm sure I can recover from the food I've eaten so far. So, I'm going to track it. But first, this calls for a picture of Hellena, my best friend :D So here's a picture of us from my wedding day.


Ok, now points, honestly. I can't remember all the times but I'll put down all the food.

Diet Jelly [0] = 0
Toast with Baked Beans [2.5] = 2.5
Bread with Margarine and Jam [2] = 4.5
Rice bowl full of peanuts [3 for 50 peanuts, I don't think I ate 50...] = 7.5
Baileys (2.5) and milk (1.5) [4] = 11.5
Two Arnotts "nice" sugar topped biscuits [2] = 13.5 (at this point it was still redeemable!)
Maccas XL diet coke [0] = 13.5
Maccas small chips [4] = 17.5
Maccas McFeast burger [12 - ouch!! no wonder I was full after half! Oh I should have not ordered it, or at least just thrown it away] = 29.5

Ouch, 29 and no dinner yet. Oh well, all I can do is get back on track from now! So here I go again, hauling myself back onto the metaphorical wagon.

At least I did the walk, all up we took about 2 hours. Which is worth 5 bonus points. Wow!! So the net damage is only 24 - that's only 3 over. Maybe I can even get D to come for a walk tonight and undo the damage, or at least fit in a bit of walking.

Anyway, with all this stressing over how much I've eaten and the walking and the maccas and everything I've still got hours of study to do! So, ciao for now!

xx

Food after 6pm:

2 cups water [0]

Diet coke [0] - finishing off the maccas diet coke

Marshmallows (hmmm)

Ravioli for dinner (not too much)

Food at the party:

Apple pie with cream - as small a slice as I could cut

Babaganoush and Hommus on pita bread - about 6 dips

Amazing Cheese Platter - about 5 slices of cheese, maybe only 4

One glass of Punch

Back at home:

Sugarfree V

And tomorrow is a brand new day, thank goodness!

Off to see the wizard(/supervisor!) (H: 85.9)

Off to see my thesis supervisor - will report in later!

x

7.30am Two Toast - one with vegemite (1) , one with peanut butter (1 + 1.5), and a glass of skim milk (1.5) (5 > 5 points)
12.30pm Pasta (4) with Bolognaise (2.5) (6.5 > 11.5)
2.30pm Two Freddo Frogs (3 > 14.5)
2.30pm Two starburst lollies (0.5 > 15)
2.45pm Gloria Jeans Iced Coffee (5 > 20) [OUCH!! I didn't realise it was so high!!]
6.30pm Couscous (2 > 22)
8.00pm Fish Korma (4 > 26)

... well I'm over by 5 points (damn gloria jeans!!) but I guess that's just life.

In other news I had a great report from my supervisor today so I'm feeling more on track which is good.

Oh - last night we went out with some friends and saw STEP UP 2 - in a word "wow". I really want to be able to dance like that! So I did some push ups and sit ups this morning to build up to being able to control my body like that. Wow! Totally recommend it. Unfortunately cause it was the 9.15 session we got home late after hanging out and I was really tired today - thus the afternoon chocolate and coffee :S

xx

WI Day Rolls Around Again (H: 85.1) (WI: 85.2)

This is the most nervous day of my week. Weigh In Day.

Wish me luck!

Note: I'm so nervous. I'd love to WI under 85kg today, I'd LOVE to break that barrier, it would make me the slimmest since I started ww, and the slimmest I've been this year. But I'm so nervous that I might achieve it that all I can think of is everything I want to eat BEFORE I weigh in. I'm thinking I should drink 2L of water now, eat a huge bowl of couscous, devour some ice-cream. My mind is trying to sabotage me! But I won't give in - I'm not eating a bite until I've weighed in. I'll do what I always do and take something to eat during the meeting... rather than my normal sandwich I might even take couscous - I don't need to eat it now if I know I'll eat it in 2 hours time. I'm so nervous, if I do go under 85 I never want to be above it again, this is a big morning for me.

... I caved.

9.02am One Cup of Couscous (2 > 2 points)
10.30am Water (600ml) (0 > 2 points)
11.10am 3 Macadamia Nuts & Bite of Chocolate (1 > 3 points)
1.15pm Three rolls of sushi (7 > 10 points)
1.20pm Coke Zero (0 > 10 points)
3.00pm Oreo Biscuit (1 > 11 points)
4.20pm Water (0 > 11 points)
5.20pm XL Diet Coke (0 > 11 points)
5.20pm McDonalds Snack Wrap (4.5 > 15.5 points) - and it didn't even taste good.
6.16pm 2 Grapes (0 > 15.5 points)
9.15pm Subway Turkey & Ham 6 Inch on Italian Herb & Cheese Bread with Sweet Onion Sauce (4.5 > 20 points)

I'm not sure if I have to add a point for the cheese and the sauce from subway? Anyway I'm counting it as it is on the etools, hey, I had it as they suggested (and dairy's important, right?). So I'm counting today as a star-day :D

... anyway I weighed in at 85.2, so still a loss, but didn't break the 85 barrier. Next week it's mine!! I'm sticking to the letter this week - bring it on! Still, I'm back to my pre-Easter weight :D

The Up(Down)Side to the Flu (H: 85.1)

[Star Update for Yesterday: One star :D Under points (by lots!), but no non-incidental exercise.]

One day of the flu and I'm down a kilo. Which is good in short term, but if that's why it's been lost it will be a struggle to keep it off for next week.

Yesterday when I started sleeping I just crashed - I slept for 6 hours, then spent the rest of the day on the couch. Today I'm a bit better, but still have achey head, teeth, eyes, back, feet, throat and fluey feeling. So today is another quiet rest day. I ate a vegemite toast for breakfast, but I don't feel hungry.

I don't have anything more interesting to write, because I had such a boring day - sorry! I did watch some of "Good Luck Chuck" it's so-so... on the lower end of so-so.

xx

7.45am - Toast with Vegemite (1 > 1 points)
11.00am - Diet Aeroplane Jelly, Lime (0 > 1 points)
11.40am - Leftover Chicken Wing (2.5 > 3.5 points)
12.00pm - Peanuts (0.5 > 4 points)
12.30pm - Popcorn with salt and tbsp margarine (3pts for marg! ouch!) (4.5 > 8.5 points)
12.55pm - Large Water (0 > 8.5 points)
1.05pm - Teaspoon of Peanut Butter (0.5> 9 points)
[1.30 - 5.30 = sleeping, 4 hours]
5.39pm - Two Spoons Diet Jelly (0 > 9 points)
7.30pm - Couscous with prawn and vegies, 1 cup (2 > 11 points)
7.50pm - One Glass Orange Juice (2 > 13 points)
8.00pm - Three Glasses of Water (0 > 13 points)
8.30pm - Watermelon with 1 tbsp Mango Frozen Yoghurt (1 > 14 points)

Wow that looks like a lot of food.